If you suffer from depression, anxiety or CPTSD as a result of having a hurtful mother, maybe it’s time you consider getting some help and exploring your options. You don’t have to live this way for the rest of your life!
I provide trauma informed therapy for adults who suffered adverse childhood experiences (ACES) as a result of a hurtful mother. My practice serves California and Nevada with Telehealth and in person counseling.
Did your mother ever hit, scratch or pinch you with her hands or whatever object that was handy? Or Did she ever push you or throw something at you so hard you were marked or injured?
Did your mother ever berate you to the point of tears? Criticize you unnecessarily? Embarrass or humiliate you in front of your friends or relative? Curse or humiliate you?
Did your mother depend on you to take care of a younger sibling when you were younger than 8? Expect you to cook or clean instead of playing with friends?
Did your mother drink or use drugs instead of caring for you? Ever forget to feed you, sign your report card or allow you to go to school unkept because she was too drunk or high to notice?
Did your mother ever shame you for your passions? Having conflicting interests? For being LGBTQIA+?
Did your mother ever forget to pick you up after school, take care of you when you were sick or not bother to show up for your school plays, sports events or graduations because she had ‘better’ things to do?
Psycho-Education: First and foremost, I can help you to understand about Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and how your past affects your present.
Tracking Triggers: I will teach you about triggers and which are related to your past. I call them ‘trauma responses’. Just understanding that you are being triggered by something that happened long ago, is often enough to help you to manage strong emotions.
ACE Score: We will determine your own personal ‘aces’ (adverse childhood experiences) and how your past affects your personal as well as your work relationships
Treatment Medods: I utilize a variety of treatment methods to help in your healing process including but not limited to: Somatic techniques, Parts Work, Cognitive Behavioral (CBT) Therapy and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT)
Self Regulation: Learning about your nervous system is one of the most important aspects of healing. When we are triggered, we go into what is known as survival response. You have probably heard about which is your 'fight, flight, and freeze’. You may not know about some of the others labeled as 'fawn, cry for help and please and appease’. I will teach you some simple but highly effective ways to get you back into a manageable state often referred to as you ‘window of tolerance’.
Ongoing Development: Treating trauma is something that is still developing. I fully embrace the evidenced based idea that healing from childhood trauma is the key to living a more fulfilled life. I can’t go back and change your past but I can help you understand how it affects you. Most important it’s my personal goal for you to fully get none of it was your fault.
Unfortunately, when I point out to my clients their symptoms are a result of the way they were raised, I often receive resistance that often comes in the form of:
While that may be true, we now understand that the suppression of feelings such as anger and fear doesn’t mean that feelings aren’t there. They are merely suppressed. Some of these feelings would not be remembered from point A to point B because they happened long before your brain was developed. When the memory part of your brain is not developed, your right brain emotional side takes over. That’s when you feel a sense of something that is pure emotion. Hence, things like fear or anger will be remembered but in a different way.
Trauma treatment is no longer about encouraging you to remember or tell your story. We already know it was bad. Trauma treatment is now about tracking what you feel in your body and noticing your triggers. When do you feel disproportionately frightened, angry or sad? Is it more about your past or your present?
First you have to be honest. In reality, we both know she could have done better and in many cases, a lot better. Trauma treatment is about understanding the effects of childhood trauma and how it affected your past as well as how it is affecting your present. I personally take issue with the word, ‘forgive’. I feel that it’s very off the feeling. Instead, I prefer to use the words ‘let go of’. I help my clients let go of the past hurt, understand it wasn’t their fault and live a full life in the present. That often includes embracing old dreams and developing creative their innate creative abilities.
If you live in California or Nevada, please contact me. I’m non-judgmental and easy to talk to.
I’ve seen it all, so give me a call:
Jackie Castro, The Mama Trauma Therapist
818-377-4484
therapywithcare@gmail.com
